I run my own spiritual business and my boyfriend is in a doctorate program. We couldn't be in more opposite worlds some days. But he is always my biggest reminder of how a deeper, spiritual perspective can fill even the most challenging circumstances with ease and trust.
There are moments when his workload seems completely unmanageable. When he is faced with exam after exam, long class hours, intense labs, and barely has time to take care of himself. Read until the end to learn how he's used this exact mindset shift to get amazing grades without letting the stress take over.
Even if you're not in a doctorate program, it's likely that there is stress in your life that seems to never go away. Worrying about your financial future, if you'll ever find your life partner, stressful family dynamics, car problems, house problems, illness, fear of loved ones dying...you name it.
There is so much that is unknown in our world. The unknown has scared the sh*t out of humans for generations. We have been conditioned by our parents, who were conditioned by their parents, and so on, to believe that we have to always think ten steps ahead and work as hard as possible to make sure that our fears don't actually happen.
This leads most of us to be in a state of constant fight or flight. We don't believe that things are working out for us, we believe that WE have to work things out for us. We convince ourselves that if we just focus on it a little more, we will have the power to prevent bad things from happening or find a creative solution.
Now, I'm gonna say something that only a few of you will really be able to take in:
The belief that you have to work extremely hard, stress about your life, and figure everything out yourself is an illusion. An illusion that was passed on for generations as the TRUTH. It's probably hard for you to question it because it has been so engrained in the human psyche.
But when you begin to open up to and understand the laws of the universe, you realize that this belief is the very thing making your life harder than it needs to be.
There is always a non-resistant way to approach your stress and fears, but your beliefs about the way that life works prevent you from seeing it.
The truth is that we live in a vibrational universe. I'm sure you've heard by now that everything is energy. When you can learn to master your own energy - AKA the beliefs you hold that create emotions within you, you can begin to trust more deeply and change your circumstances without forcing your way there.
I want you to consider the fear that takes over when you get sick...
Here are the two ways you could approach this:
1. The unconscious, resistant response that most of us do:
Think about the fear constantly, how it's going to impact your work week, how you're going to fall behind. You wonder if you have Covid or the flu. You start to panic. You get mad at yourself for going out, not washing your hands that one time, or whatever you think you did to get sick. You try to push through the sickness and work anyways. You might tell yourself you're not deserving of a day in bed watching TV since you got yourself into this mess. The sickness seems to last longer and longer, and every day you are mad at yourself for not being better already.
2. The conscious, non-resistant response:
You are curious about why you are sick, but you do not try to fight against it. You know that there is no use in shaming yourself for things that are in the past, and you begin to question: I wonder if this is my body's way of telling me to slow down? You surrender to what's happening. You allow yourself to rest because there is no other option at this point. You trust that whatever you are missing out on this week was something that you were not meant to experience. You recover quickly because you gave yourself the time to get well.
In both of these cases, you were sick. There was no way around it. But in the first response, you believed that fixating on what you could have done differently and forcing yourself to work would make things better. Instead, you remained in a vibration of fear and prolonged the problem because of that energy.
In the second response, you chose to free yourself from what you couldn't control. You surrendered to what was showing up and gave yourself time to receive the healing (or solution) when it was meant to come.
The truth is, that in every difficulty that shows up for us, we always have this choice. But so many of us have been taught to live with fear.
As you can see in the first example, the frequency of fear, lack, and and stress will prolong and attract similar circumstances into your life. Proving to you that, once again, you need to keep stressing because life is continuously hard.
But you have the power to put an end to this at any moment. And no, you don't have to ONLY think positive thoughts. Simply having awareness that you are telling yourself a false story is a good step in the right direction. Questioning these beliefs is where we all start. And your awareness pauses the momentum of the lower vibrational manifestations.
To practice the non-resistant approach, follow these 6 steps:
Clearly define what is stressing you out in detail
Ask yourself: are there any clear action steps I can take in this VERY moment to ease some of this stress?
Is this action coming from fear and shame or love for myself?
If it is coming from love, take the action. If it is coming from fear, take a day to reflect.
After the action is taken, or if no action has been taken, repeat out loud: I surrender this fear to the universe. I trust that I can take a few days to pause and wait for the answer to be shown to me. I am willing to receive guidance on the next steps to take. I will honor myself by waiting to be shown the path of least resistance.
Distract yourself. Read a book, watch a show, do something fun. Anytime you find yourself obsessing, repeat: I surrender, I surrender, I surrender.
If you've had enough and are ready to take this perspective into your own life, then feel free to go. But if you want more proof, keep reading:
Let's go back to the example of my boyfriend in his program. He knows that achieving his doctorate takes time and effort. But through these spiritual teachings, he has realized that the stress and fear around it is not helping him to move forward. He now understands that his vibration is what matters most.
When he's studying and feels that he doesn't have enough time, he takes a deep breath and surrenders to the fact that he is doing the best that he can. When he is tired and fears he hasn't done enough, he lets himself go to sleep instead of letting the fear keep him up when he is no longer able to absorb information.
Before his exams, he visualizes himself knowing every answer and receiving the grade that he wants.
He shows up for his responsibilities, doesn't make it harder on himself than it needs to be,. and uses the law of attraction to fill in the rest.
The result? (a humble brag) - he has a 4.0 GPA without the perfectionism, stress, and anxiety.
My point is - when you change your beliefs about how to solve your problems and get what you want, the solution can come to you with ease. When you trust that the universe is supporting you, you open up space to be supported.
So, what current stressors can you apply this to in your own life? Comment them below or share them on my last IG post!